Holiday Message: Words of Wisdom from Lorraine

B. Kim Barnes, Barnes & Conti CEO

In recent times, I have occasionally found myself thinking, “I’m glad my mother didn’t live to see this.” My mom, Lorraine Shapiro, was a warmhearted, charismatic introvert. She had been a professional singer (mezzo-soprano) in her twenties and retained that ability to perform that characterizes introverts with a public presence. It stood her in good stead during the many years she worked with patients and staff at Kaiser Permanente in Los Angeles. She was a woman of beauty and enormous dignity who knew how to make others feel included, special, and important. She maintained a belief in the essential goodness of people, despite having lived through difficult times. I sometimes think she was the sort of person Anne Frank might have grown up to be.

Our relationship endured through my annoying adolescence and stormy early marriage and became one of mutual love, respect, and support. She believed in her two children and thought we had fascinating lives and careers (though she always had trouble explaining to her friends just what it was I did for a living). I thought for many years that she had an overly optimistic view of humanity – and I still do – but she held on to the values she believed in and passed on to us. I think if these universal values were held and the associated behaviors were practiced widely the world would, indeed, be the better place she believed it to be. Many years ago, shortly after her death, I wrote them down, both to remind myself to practice them and to pass them on to my grandchildren. I called them, “Lorraine’s Laws.” In this holiday season when there is so much cruelty and chaos happening in the world, I think we need them more than ever. 

Lorraine’s Laws: One Family’s Values

• Treat everyone with kindness and respect.
• Don’t cry over spilled milk. Acknowledge mistakes and failures, then move on.
• Value and seek to understand people who are different from you.
• Contribute in a positive way to your community. Participate in the political process.
• Avoid defensiveness. Accept responsibility for what you have chosen to do, even if it didn’t turn out as you hoped or expected.
• Avoid self-righteousness and judgment. Be self-critical; don't let yourself get away with getting “too big for your boots”
• Avoid self-dramatization and self-importance; don’t pout and don’t whine.
• Use both your mind and your heart in making decisions. Think about the impact of your decisions on others.
• Learn all the time. Keep an open mind, always listen to new ideas and information even if it conflicts with what you think you already know for sure.
• Forgive those who have wronged you.
• Forgive yourself for the wrongs you have done in the past once you have done everything you can to repair the damage.
• Love and appreciate your family — and provide whatever support is needed for one another to be successful.
• Look for and expect the best from people (family, friends, coworkers, neighbors, etc.) — pass on compliments and positive feedback; let people know what they are doing right. Avoid gossip and negative comments about people.
• Be proud of your heritage.
• Use your talents.
• Stand up and speak out for what you believe in even though you know your opinion may be unpopular.
• If you have an issue with someone, talk it out. Don’t hold on to resentments, especially within the family.
• Be interested in what others have to offer, regardless of their age, position, occupation, education, ethnic background, etc. Seek a diversity of opinion; talk to and learn from people who are different from you in many ways.
• Bring your whole self to your work, whatever it is. Demonstrate your love and commitment to those whom you touch in your work.
• Don’t come down to the level of people who treat you rudely or unfairly. Find a way to rise to the occasion and keep your dignity.
• Enjoy your life, it is a blessing.

Wishing you a loving and hopeful holiday season and a more peaceful world in the New Year. 

Updated Catalog

Please look at our latest catalog of offerings and let us know what needs we might be able to help you with as you look to 2024 and beyond. We would love to be working with you!

Please download the catalog here and feel free to contact Lauren Powers (lpowers@barnesconti.com)/215-850-2882 to discuss your needs and how we might partner to design a custom solution for your organization.

Announcing Public Programs for 2024!

Exercising Influence: Description and Schedule

In this two-session virtual program, participants will learn and then go beyond the basics to dive deeper into the influence behavior model. They will have more opportunities for skill-practice and feedback. They will plan and practice for a real and significant upcoming influencing opportunity.

• February 6 & 8, 2024
• May 8 & 15, 2024
• July 23 & 25, 2024
• October 15 & 22, 2024

Cost: $950

Register online

All sessions begin at 8:30 am and run until 12:00 noon, Pacific Time

Our 23rd Annual Virtual Feast

Barnes & Conti continues our tradition of sharing some favorite recipes with you.

Recipes in the Feast

• Appetizer: Elegant Figs with Goat Cheese and Almonds
  Operations Manager Elaine Turcotte contributed this simple yet elegant dish.
  
• Salad: Pear and Gorgonzola Salad
  Kim Barnes contributed this classic recipe in our 2003 holiday newsletter. We thought it was well-worth sharing with our updated and expanded newsletter family 20 years later.
• Main Dish: Pistachio Crusted Salmon
  Lauren Powers, SVP of Business Development, contributed this quick, easy, and festive recipe that is a family favorite.
• Main Dish: Tagine of Chicken with Orange Juice and Olives
  Joel Kleinbaum, Tech Guy and Home Chef, developed this take off on a classic Moroccan tagine.
• Side Dish: Sweet and Sour Braised Red Cabbage
  Joel Kleinbaum, contributed this Middle Eastern take on a Central European classic.
• Dessert: Crostata di Marmelata — Jam Tart
  Kim Barnes enjoyed this pastry in Italy, and when she returned, discovered a recipe in her collection that matched! The Italian version was made with apricot jam.
• Dessert: Mrs. Silver's Pears
  Lauren Powers submitted this simple and elegant recipe. The recipe is a family classic, passed down from a friend of Lauren's mother.

Featured Recipe: Pistachio Crusted Salmon

Lauren Powers, SVP Business Development

Lauren writes: “Whole Foods and Wegman’s each had already breaded versions of this weekly mainstay that I would then pop into the oven for a quick meal. Suddenly, Whole Foods no longer carried it and I was on my own. So I created my own recipe combining some of the ingredients from both stores’ versions. It was so easy, very quick and really good!”

“I did not use any measurements so you will have to work according to your own preferences.”

“Our favorite way to serve this is with Bob’s favorite breadcrumb noodles.”

Ingredients:

• One salmon fillet for each person
• A few tbsps Hellman’s mayonnaise
• A few tbsps Grey Poupon Mustard
• 1/2 – 1 tsp wasabi powder
• Pistachio nuts, salted, shelled and chopped finely
• Panko breadcrumbs (I use Italian flavored)

Method:

1. Preheat oven to 450 degrees
2. Mix mayonnaise, mustard, and wasabi.
3. Chop pistachios.
4. Combine equal portions of nuts to panko breadcrumbs and season with salt, pepper and garlic salt.
5. Spread a light coating of mayo mixture on top and sides of fish (not on skin).
6. Coat sides and tip of fish with breadcrumb mixture.
7. Place fillets skin-side down in greased ceramic baking dish.
8. Roast for 10 minutes until done.

About the Artwork at the Top:

A lithograph of one of Pablo Picasso’s “Doves of Peace.”

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